The end of a relationship is a super difficult task, but not impossible. Some habits of self-love must be maintained to overcome this moment of new opportunities.
Relationships are necessary and human beings were made to live in society. But ending a relationship is always a painful process. Life is constantly changing and these challenges can always surprise us when they appear. Above all, breakups are the ones that bring us down the most and make us question a lot of what we experience.
However, anyone who has gone through this type of experience knows that it is always a good opportunity for a fresh start. There is no way to leave a relationship without evolving and learning more about yourself.
To do this, it is necessary to go through some steps to overcome and finally move on. Above all, never stop asking for help if you feel like you can’t overcome it alone, because we are not alone. There is a way out.
Why does the end always happen?
Relationship is partnership, trust, planning and a lot of dialogue. Now, if these pillars are compromised, stay tuned, as it could be one of the signs pointing to the end of the relationship. We always expect a lot when we get into dating or marriage, which also gives us a great feeling of frustration.
Trust is, therefore, the most important thing in building a relationship between two people. If this bond of respect between the two has been broken, if there is no longer any peace of mind and if the fights are increasing, it is a sign. Don’t ignore it, as insistence can be a trigger for depression, low self-esteem and personal sacrifices that only slow down our lives.
Another fact that, consequently, leads to the end of the relationship is the lack of complicity. Mutual support, planning, that simple “what do you think?”, or loving concern for each other is fundamental to the health of coexistence. If this simple healthy concern is no longer part of the routine, something is wrong.
Signs that the end of the relationship has arrived
Certainly, there are several factors that can influence the end of the relationship. Everyday life becomes heavy, attitudes between them become more difficult, incomprehensible for one side or the other. But, at first, we have to keep in mind that relating is dealing with different people, creations and thoughts. Conflicts always appear over time.
We are dealing with human beings who adapt and adapt to situations. One of the reasons for the end of the relationship is this: reluctance to change. Change is synonymous with empathy, as we always have to think about how to act in favor of the harmony of coexistence. But we all have an individuality and we shouldn’t leave it aside.
Therefore, it is the wear and tear caused by the request for change and the lack of respect for each person’s particularities that can tragically end in an unwanted ending. There is no better test than coexistence. And, if there was no compatibility or possibility of readjustment between the two, ending it, after all, can avoid many future problems.
Other reasons for the end
Apart from these daily problems, which can end up wearing down the relationship, there are other more serious reasons. Betrayal, physical and verbal aggression, toxic and abusive relationships are synonymous with the end and it is a necessary attitude for the psychological health of both sides. Therefore, various attitudes reveal themselves over time and are the basis for balancing the decision to remain, or to free oneself.
Signs of the end of sex
Sex is, above all, a manifestation of love between the couple. It is the most intimate moment between two people who love each other.
Sexuality requires a lot of understanding, and knowing a person’s desires and desires more deeply. However, if one of the two sides starts to no longer care about the feelings and needs of the other person and ends up monopolizing decisions, it is very difficult to sustain the situation.
Freedom in relationships, even at this time, is very important for personal development and brings a lot of happiness to the couple. If this no longer makes sense in the relationship, it’s not very cool to keep punching each other with a knife. Try to talk and avoid developing into a toxic relationship
Absence of complicity
Even though we don’t have a big crystal ball that shows us the future and what awaits us, it’s always good to plan. This habit is healthy in a relationship, whether for the near future or in the long term. It’s an important signal screaming “I care, I want to be with you”. If the plans are no longer the same between the two, there are differences in the relationship that can, ultimately, end the feelings.
It is possible to talk and try to understand what the person is feeling, aiming for their own life. If you can adapt to the person’s plans and find a balance, that’s fine. But, if there is no space for you in your partner’s future, the best thing is to say goodbye, because the feelings end up becoming confused and with no prospect of continuity.
How to get over the end of a relationship?
If the end were, in principle, easy to overcome, we wouldn’t be so afraid of the possibility of its appearance. We have a post-relationship “mourning” phase that needs to be respected, felt so as not to turn into a more serious mental illness. Many people keep their frustration to themselves and avoid talking, venting and getting over the breakup, the absence of their ex-partner.
Although complicated, the ideal is to try, above all, to get out of this and open up to the world. It’s not the end of the world, life is much more precious than we imagine. If a door closes, there is always an open window ready to give us a new opportunity. Therefore, to see it, you need to take some basic care with yourself so as not to sink deeper and deeper into yourself.
Feeling is necessary
The first step to overcoming the end of a relationship is to let yourself feel. Avoid judging yourself, or feeding thoughts that put you increasingly down. And if you need to cry, scream, express your feelings, let it all out, without any shame. Everyone goes through this type of feeling and expressing it is synonymous with maturity and respect for yourself.
As a result, getting things out there will help you better understand what’s going on inside. Make no mistake, because naming feelings, knowing where they come from, is important for overcoming them. Think about it, it’s much easier to walk with the lights on than to walk in the dark. This is how it works inside us and ignoring the voice of your heart is the same as dealing with the unknown, it generates fear, insecurity and stagnates you in time.
Seek time with yourself
Sometimes the world doesn’t give us enough time to digest situations. Don’t underestimate the effects of the end of a relationship, because a person’s life can leave gaps and marks that we don’t notice. It is very common to opt for escape, enter into another relationship, and try to forget the past once and for all. But, it is not ideal for overcoming.
To do this, set aside time with yourself, because it is in silence that we return to balance and understand our feelings. Self-knowledge is everything, when it comes to growth and moving forward. Observe your behaviors from this moment of reflection, rethink your habits and don’t forget to open yourself up to new experiences.
Seek help
Everyone has a good friend to turn to in difficult times. Listening to other people can be the key to solving your problems. A word of comfort, a hug, affection are always welcome post-relationship. The simple fact of seeking help is liberating and, incredible as it may seem, opening up is the best decision if you want to get out of the hole once and for all.
Avoid leaks
Firstly, the biggest mistake after the end of a relationship is taking a peek at your ex-partner’s social media. Doing so is an almost masochistic and completely baseless attitude. This is where false hope and delay in life live. We are trapped in a reality that does not exist, as the virtual world is shallow and full of traps.
Make it a habit to trick your mind when there is the slightest sign of curiosity. Don’t feed suffering that you already know you will overcome if you keep this getaway. Focus on your well-being, conscience doesn’t take a vacation and you’re the one who will be with you at all times.
Vent
At first, not everyone finds it easy to open up to a friend. Or, not everyone has the ability to welcome and understand another person. That’s why when you notice that everything is difficult to overcome, the doors are increasingly closed, and you can’t find a way out, seek professional help.
Good therapy will allow you to see the facts, know what is happening inside you and open the paths. A professional look is perfect, as it is outside your reality, is not troubled and will help you have a general and rational view of what is happening with your feelings. This process can also make you see very beautiful parts of yourself and you will certainly be surprised at what you are capable of.
Rethink your daily habits
As soon as we get into a relationship, we adapt to a routine as a couple that, post-relationship, is sorely missed. Therefore, the best thing is to sit down and plan your new routine. Opening up new possibilities for relationships with the world will help to overcome the absence and end of the relationship. Just look carefully and you will see the countless possibilities.
If you are having difficulties, start small and do physical exercise, as the habit of exercising releases very pleasurable substances that will help you think better. Read a new book, or go to the movies with a friend. Take the opportunity to return to your studies, or pursue a dream that, during the relationship, you ended up abandoning.
Ending the cycle
As a result of all the previous habits, you will be closing a cycle in your life. This will open up new opportunities, leaving you ready to face, perhaps, a new relationship. Or, simply enjoy the best of your own company. It is extremely important to close the cycles to live well, away from traumas and addictions that hold us back.
Finally, learn more about attitudes that cause emotional dependence in Emotional dependence – What it is, how to identify it and how to overcome it
Sources: El País, Psychologists in São Paulo, Catraca Livre, Vittude
Image sources: Vittude, Bol Notícias, Veja, Wiki How, Valkirias, Gazeta do Povo, Unidas da Fossa, Vittude 2, Show Metech, Eu Sem Fronteiras, BBC, Blog Mara, Fala Universidades
